Do the stages of your personal life align with the stages of your professional career?
My family kicked off the New Year by celebrating my mother’s 80th birthday. Retired educator, mother of four, grandmother of seven, and great grandmother of five was surrounded by her family to celebrate her life. It was an honor and privilege to have the opportunity to celebrate my mother. While planning the guest list, party venue, and decorations, we spent time creating a playlist of her favorite songs for the DJ to play. Truth be told, the dancing was the priority event of the night. Her 80th birthday was a time to reflect over her life, her legacy, and to be surrounded with love. It is a stage of her life where she was able think of all that she has accomplished and all the things that are still left for her to do. She’s 80 years old with so much more to contribute to the world.
I am excited to say that I celebrated two milestones in 2023. I turned 50 years old, and I celebrated 30 years of marriage to my husband and high school sweetheart, Louis. Where did the time go? (Insert dramatic pause and exhale) Just, wow! The reality of being married to the same man for 30 years is truly a blessing. It was NOT an easy journey, but that story is for another article. In addition to being married to my husband, we had the privilege of raising two young men, and now are grandparents to two beautiful granddaughters who call us, Nonna and PoppO.
I was excited about turning 50 years old. It gave me a reason to throw myself a party. It wasn’t just any party, it was a party that included a DJ, caterers, a new red dress, and 70 of my best friends and family that all wore white attire. Yep, I was the woman in the red dress surrounded by others wearing all white attire. It was an evening to remember. However, my age, status, or stage of life didn’t affect me until I began to receive mail from AARP about becoming a member. Woah, slow down here, you’re starting to get too serious. Why did I start to receive mail from AARP when I just turned 50 years old? I thought that was for people who were retired. I feel as though I am just getting started with my career, my life, and my dreams.
Like many of us who celebrate milestones, I began to reflect over my life measuring myself against my goals, aspirations, and age based on what “they” tell us. If we’re honest, there are these little voices that often tell us what we should be doing by a certain age, our educational status, how much money we should have saved for retirement, and life goals that should be accomplished. OK, since I mentioned retirement, can we talk about how much money we “should” have saved for retirement? Nothing makes me feel poorer and unworthy than looking at my retirement savings’ dashboard comparing me to people in my age group. Who are these people!!?? Seriously, I feel like the people who have 75% more in their savings are the real heroes in this world. I also think “they” started their retirement savings during early adolescence stage. At this point of my life, I am not sure if retirement will be in my near future. Apologies, I digressed.
Where are you in the Various Stages of Life?
There’s a ton of research and literature about the various stages of life. According to Erik Erikson’s theory, there are eight stages of life? His hypothesis covers eight life stages as follows:
- Infancy
- Toddlerhood
- Preschool years
- Early school years
- Adolescence
- Young adulthood
- Middle adulthood
- Late adulthood
There are many other theories of stages of life that include Jean Piaget’s theory of cognitive development, Daniel Levison’s Season of Life theory, and Klaus Riegel’s Dimension of Development, to name a few.
Did you know there are also Stages of a Typical Career?
According to Kimberli Lowe-MacAuley of Flexjobs, there are 5 stages of a Typical Career.
- Exploration
- Establishment
- Mid-Career
- Late Career
- Retirement
Things to Remember
I consistently examine the stage of my personal life versus the stage of my career. There are days when I feel that my time is running out, while other days I think, “this is just the beginning!” Whether you assess your stages of life on a daily, monthly, or annually, I want to remind of a few things:
1. There’s no better time than right now. What are you waiting for to finish the degree, get the certification, write the book, or say the speech?
2. Whatever dream or vision that you’ve been holding on to, do it. Who gets to tell you whether you are old enough, smart enough, or good enough?
3. Who cares about what “they” say? Do it anyway!
4. Never allow anyone, researcher, expert, or 401K comparison to define your stage of life. The stage is all yours.
5. Trust your gut. You know yourself better than anyone else.